Thursday, February 13, 2014

Day 166: Why Do I Care?


Cux 32nd,4288: 166 Days in the Mortal Realm

The shop's been a nice change of pace. It’s relatively quiet even with the handful of Gnomes come in. It’s curious watching them. There’s something in their eyes as they did business with Gemmel. Something about him that I can’t describe for words fail me. They aren’t afraid of him per se, but they seem wary in his presence. Often I’ve wondered these past few days if there was something I was missing. I observed Gemmel and never had he made me question my decision to stay with him. There wasn’t anything about him to suggest he wasn’t honest of character, especially in his interactions with me.
Gemmel continues to share of his potions in the hope that I won’t transform further or as rapidly. He even lets me stay in the shop at night. Though he said I needn’t keep an eye on his items, I’ve done my fair share of watching the shoppers and taking note of his inventory these past two days. Something that gives me a sense of recompencense.
Oh how I missed my gear. How vulnerable I was without it. Yet I had to forget about those things too. Remembering them infuriated me. Not knowing who had caused this new life for me was maddening. Do I even go about finding my things considering I couldn’t recall who took them?
‘Oh hai,’ runs through my head constantly. Who ever that guy was, I loathe him. Why did he leave me to suffer and die a lizard? If he knew me and wanted me dead, why not have killed me right then? Right now death seems so preferable. No more suffering, no more caring.
Ah, that must be it; I care too much. Next Entry

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